heess.. tired... =))
didn't blog for two days....
hmms.. partially.. didn't know wad to blog yesterday..
den happen to hear my blog song.. reminded me of the task to blog hehs =)
just reached home..
finished my dinner..
laksa =x yummies..
even though i finished it with much effort
due to its spiciness =x
it was nice overall hehss..
no wonder that long queue i saw juz now eh ..
tired.... yawnnssss zzz
backed from SP... hahass.. so late riteesss
people will complain that i am mad lor..
so late still in SP.. siao de
budden in SP.. it was fun.. =)
esp with 1B04 peeps.. hurrayss
played photohunt and pool with em..
hahass we are all mad people..
spend hours trying to break record in the photohunt =x
felt shag oso... after school.. haiss
back and shoulder aches lehs..
hahass.. achess... arrgh
how good can it be if someone will massage for me >.>
hahas =p but i know its impossible hehss .. continue dreaming, JJ =))
---
hmms... i feel really guilty.. all of a sudden...
out of nowhere, this feeling emerged from within...
i feel.. guilty about what i am doing now...
hmms.. the way i am spending my time away...
is it really that wise?..
what will i really get..
i don't know...
feeling lost...
somehow.. this feeling of lost..
hard to describe..
so random rite.. budden all comes suddenly..
something pop up into my mind...
all of a sudden.. dunno why.. haisss....
honestly.. i feel that the foundations i have built for the past one year
thought the foundation for my future.. "was" firm...
but didn't expect me to see myself in this state now..
it is like i am breaking my own efforts..
efforts made over the past year...
starting to regret it...
(( haiss i should really do something ))
I don't get it..
i really don't.. How come..
everything comes and goes so fast..
it is like one moment.. i have everything...
and the other.. i am nothing..
did i really led myself to a dead end on my life path, life journey??
since the start of this hard journey,
i have been constantly improving myself..
in terms of knowledge, skills and so on..
and i am constantly telling myself..
keep going on..
no matter what..
even if the going gets tough...
never give up!!!
and that's what i have been doing..
for the past few months at least...
all till now.. April 2008..
whr i really feel lost...
i nd guidiance..
i nd someone to walk this journey with me..
i nd someone to give me a hand...
coz i had really went through a hard fall...
but who will really understand me?
not sure, haiss..
i really don't wan everything to end so soon
i feel that i have been trapped..
trapped in my own hands..
my own playful self.. the bad side of me..
i know..
i know my responsibilities right now..
at this very moment..
i know that alot of people is waiting for me..
waiting for the person who is pushing hard,
pushing forward with them for months..
to return...
but i really need a break..
i know the break i took till now... is abit too long..
but please.. trust me..
if you guys are reading this..
trust me.. give me a bit more time..
i'll change.. i'll make a comeback..
with the right mindset and spirit to fight on..
Random Thoughts
somehow, i know...
from inside me..
there is a hidden power..
i dunno how to describe.. special??
but i got a feeling everyone has that different "power"..
this power.. or should i say.. force?..
this force..
feels so powerful..
so uncontrollable..
i am afraid..
scared.. i dun know what it is..
but for sure.. one thing..
I will achieve great things with it..
whether you..
the silent reader of my blog..
believe it or not..
i really don't care anymore
you can treat me as mad..
but one day..
i'll prove myself =)